Supporting the Workforce as a Modern Leader

Support as a Leader

Jeffrey Deckman, Founder Capability Accelerators

March 19, 2013

I recently designed a “Train the Trainer” program for a large organization that is modernizing their leadership culture. My role is to develop the program and train the folks at the Director level on the process. They then provide the training to the managers and supervisors of this 400+ person organization.

The topic of the most recent program was how become a “Supportive Leader”. The following are excerpts and nuggets from that training that I hope you will find beneficial both personally and for your organization.

Defining the Framework

When designing a professional development program it is imperative to define the fundamental thinking the training is based upon for the people being trained. To not do so limits the impact of the training significantly.

The following items define that thinking.

“Support” is an Organizational Asset

Supporting another is one of the most powerful relationship and culture building tools we have available to us. A team that has a supportive culture has a very powerful asset that it can use to achieve goals that otherwise would be unattainable.

Nothing says that you care about another more than when you work to support them and their growth. And when one gives support to another the favor is often returned. Over time this dynamic goes viral in the organization with people becoming intrinsically motivated to insure it continues.

        Encountering Well Intentioned Resisters

When working to support another it is possible to encounter well-intentioned resistance. While some people crave support, others have difficulty accepting it. The reasons can range from pride to embarrassment or simply that the person believes one resolves their own issues. Others still are so self sufficient that they don’t think to ask for help.

When encountering this type of resistance try nudging around the edges to find a way to offer the type of support that is in the best interest of everyone involved.

Support Does Not Always Feel Good

People often associate being supported with being agreed with or being given a helping hand. But sometimes the best support one can give is to disagree with someone or to have them address an issue on their own. It is in times such as these where the leader is supporting another’s growth instead of their wants.

The Importance of Communication

When you are supporting another’s growth instead of their wants, be aware they may feel abandoned because you are not “making their problem go away”. If these feelings arise and are not addressed, they can create resentments and damage relationships.

Therefore, it is important you stay tuned in to the “energy” of the person in question. If you sense a problem arising, be proactive and explain what you are doing and why you feel the type of support you are lending is in their best interest.

While you should not abandon actions you feel are in an individual’s best interest, it is the leader’s job to insure those negative feelings are picked up on and addressed.

The Ultimate Goal - Growth

Regardless of the type of support you have chosen to provide, if what you are doing does not help the person or the team to learn and grow then you are not really supporting them. In fact, “support” that is not empowering is not support at all. To not empower is to an enabler or to be teaching weakness.

Making it Relevant

The following are some tips you can use to increase your supportive leadership skills.  Remember: Supportive leaders create supportive cultures and supportive cultures are resilient cultures.

  

Understanding Your Role as a Supportive Leader

1.    See yourself as a steward, a “protector” and a coach of your team. Stewards provides provide wisdom. Protectors provide safety. And Coaches provide challenges.

2.    Be committed to supporting the personal and professional growth and well being of those around you. Focus upon supporting their long-term needs not on gaining their short-term approval.

3.    Remember that support could be either giving them a helping hand or giving them room to fail. (When helping a baby to learn to walk we often do it by staying out of their reach, but within their sight and encouraging them.)

4.    Stress that support is always bi-directional. They cannot expect to get what from others what they don’t give to others. So make sure you help them to understand that support is a two way street.

Tips for Leaders to Support their Team Members

1.    Understand the individual, as best you can. We cannot support what we don't understand.

2.    Ask questions. I often will ask a person how it is I might best support them. Why guess when I can simply ask? I will then do my best to help them in a way that most effective for them. 

3.    Be as transparent as possible about your motives and reasoning. Helping them to understand the “why” behind the method of support you are using. Doing so helps eliminates confusion and reduces frustration.

4.    Allow for failures. Failures and their consequences are like rewards - they are excellent teachers. Just be certain the size of failure is a bump and not a bomb!

6.    Allow for them to express their individual and collective creativity especially when it comes to problem solving. Support them in finding and using a style that works for them. What do you care if they do it differently than you would, as long as you get the desired result?

7.     Teach them independence by “teaching them to fish” as much as possible. But don’t let them starve if they aren’t catching any.

 When an organization’s leaders are supportive of those around them and are committed to building a Supportive Culture everyone wins.

Morale increases, production increases and, as a result, profits increase too.

 It is a simple formula. And it always works.

Jeffrey Deckman is the founder of Capability Accelerators and the developer of The Bigger Know Principles of Leadership. The BKPL is proven leadership system that replaces traditional command and control leadership styles with methods that convert entire organizations into vibrant and highly productive knowledge networks.

www.CapabilityAccelerators.com Www.TheBiggerKnow.com

Elders vs Egos

The Battle for the Ethos of the Modern Business

Why Past Practices are Essential to Embrace in the New Economy

So much of the traditional conversation surrounding leadership in organizations today is really off base. Like so many other things in our modern society much of the discussion around leadership is very ego based and is focused upon self promotion and/or creating one’s professional brand. 

In fact, according to Dave Logan, best selling author of Tribal Leadership, approximately 85% of all leadership books are written from what he calls the Stage 3 leadership perspective. He defines Stage 3 leadership as being one that is ego based and ego driven. 

For instance, you will see many books on leadership promoting the individual who wrote them; promoting an industry tycoon or suggesting one acts as a fighter pilot or even as a ninja when leading others. The latter of which was clearly written by an individual who clearly never studied the ancient Japanese martial art of Ninjutsu. I spent four years studying that discipline and I can tell you he had no clue what he was talking about. But he is selling books.

But that is the nature of Stage 3 leaders and leadership models. They are based upon more fluff than substance and designed to get you to buy into to some “fantasy” instead of actually giving you tools that work under fire. And lets face it, real, in the trenches leadership, on a day to day, human to human and incident by incident basis is always a trial by fire. So these folks, while perhaps well intentioned, are actually doing you more harm than good and are taking your money in the process. 

Dave’s research also reveals that 49% of all organizations operate under a Stage 3 egocentric leadership model. Another 25% of organizations are being run by apathetic leaders and another 2% by “vindictive” leaders. 

This means that 76% of all organizations operate under leadership models that empower the wants and needs of a few and which enforce authority as opposed to ones that respect, mobilize and maximize the potential of everyone in the organization. 

This is not good news because the modern era of business demands we maximize our human capital resources. Just as machines and repetitive processes generated the most financial capital in the 20^th century the human attributes of creativity, communication and collaboration are the dominant drivers of profits in this century. And egos restrict access to these critical resources.

Since the world has changed forever so too must our leadership models. To not adapt to the modern conditions will prove disastrous. Because study after study has proven, without a doubt, that people simply do not respond well to egotistical managers. And a company hemorrhages money when leadership is weak and the workforce is non-responsive.

The Return of the Elders

If you look up “elder” in the dictionary you get several bland and technical definitions. But if you ask yourself, or others around you, to define an elder I bet what comes out are words that have a sense of reverence about them. People naturally have positive associations with elders. And even if they don’t know how to describe one perfectly, they know one when they see one. 

I submit the reason for this is because the essence of what a true elder is touches upon our souls first, then the mind. And since dictionaries are written by and for brains they do a poor job of describing a word that actually connects to our anthropological tribal DNA. This speaks to the true power of, and the amount of influence, elders have on us, and by extension, our organizations.

One of the sources of their power is the fact that elders are not appointed by those in power. They are anointed by their peers. Elders are also not ego driven and therefore, are not viewed as a threat by anyone other than those who are ego driven. 

Elders are just comfortable being who they are; nothing more or nothing less. 

Who they are reflects wisdom, authenticity and integrity. How they act expresses inner strength and peace. Their words teach and heal. Their actions build and repair. They are in the tribe but are not controlled by it. They hear and listen to a higher power than typical human consciousness. And they help others to connect, or at least benefit from, that which benefits them.

People sense this and trust this. As a result they allow these special people to influence their thinking and to even enhance it. So far removed from any desire for power are elders that many don’t realize they are one. If they do realize it, they don’t allow it to affect them, other than to perhaps make them more committed to consistently acting responsibly.  

They don’t look for followers and as a result they have them. And they are loyal. 

The Importance of Engaging Elders in the Management Process 

By now it is clear why elders are so influential in the organization. They hold leadership positions whether management knows it or not. They are trusted and respected; their advice and insights are sought after and are listened to. Often people will ask elders whether or not to trust, or follow, management decrees. This means their influence often times exceeds management’s.

While this may unnerve some in management they have nothing to fear as long as they operate with the best interest of the tribe and the culture in mind. It is only if leadership becomes too self centered and begins abusing their authority or feeding themselves at the expense of the tribe that they might find themselves in a political conflict with the elders.

If that happens the elders will always win the hearts and minds of the tribe while those in authority will only get that labor which they can force from people. Since we are in a human capital driven economy this loss of employee engagement will result in losses of productivity, profits and possibly even people. 

So it is in the best interest of management not only to know identify the elders but to have healthy relationships with them as well.

To be effective a modern manager must have the tribe’s trust. This is where the elders can help. They must effectively communicate with the tribe. This is where the elders can help. And they must be able to motivate and mobilize the tribe. And once again, this is where the elders can help.

Simply put: Elders mobilize tribes. And it is through tribes that most work gets done. In fact recent research done by the McKinsey Group reveals that 67% of all work done in an organization is done through informal networks (tribes) that operate outside of the org chart. 

Since profitability is tied to accessing, mobilizing and leveraging the human capital of their tribes it is crucial that you find a way to include the input and insights of elders.

When you combine this additional leadership resource with a healthy management team you significantly increase your ability to maximize your profits. 

An Ethos that promotes Elders over Egos is a formula that simply cannot fail.

The following are traits of Tribal Elders.

1. They are humble
2. They seem to lack ego because they are comfortable with who and what they are.
3. They have opinions but never push them on others
4. They don’t care about titles or prestige but they don’t exhibit false or unnecessary modesty either
5. They are committed to principles but are detached from outcomes 
6. They live the “Serenity Prayer”
7. You trust them, unless you are a troublemaker. Then they unnerve you
8. They don’t insist upon being heard yet are willing to speak if you are willing to listen
9. They support growth 
10. They don’t sweat the small stuff. But they seem to see “everything” and understand most things.
11. They are kind. But don’t mistake their kindness for weakness. Few are stronger in spirit or character.
12. They listen more than they speak and understand more than they show.
13. They are committed to creating the next generation of elders but do not seek followers.
14. They have strong, steady moral compasses that are not affected by the “group consciousness”
15. They are, at all times, students, teachers and learners about life.
16. They believe in a power greater than themselves.
17. They are wise enough to be forceful and powerful when it is in the best interest of the greater good
18. If they had a motto it might read something like: I am what I am and I will be that with as much honor and grace as I can muster.

If your organization has the benefit of having one or more elders in it then consider yourself fortunate. If you are one, you probably don’t identify yourself as one but others do. So thank you for your service. 

Jeffrey Deckman is the founder of Capability Accelerators, a consulting firm that specializes in developing resilient leadership teams and organizations...One human at a time. If you have questions or comments he can be reached at JDeckman@CapabilityAccelerators.com

www.CapabilityAccelerators.com   www.TheBiggerKnow.com 

What If, as a Manager, You Had Access to a Living, Talking Library?

“What if you had access to a living, talking library that collectively contained all the information you need to run, grow and innovate your business. Would you be excited to access that powerful resource on a daily basis and pick its brain? Would you be excited to go to where it was in your building and engage it? 

... Of course you would”.

The new century has ushered in a new economy that is very different from anything we have experienced in the past. The 20th century’s three most reliable and trusted models to increase profits are no longer available to today’s executives. 

You cannot raise prices – No one will pay them

You cannot buy cheaper – You have already negotiated as much as you can

You cannot easily capture new clients – Your competitors are fiercely competitive

So this leaves business owners and executives in small, medium and large companies with two choices:

1. Accept the situation and deal with shrinking profits

2. Innovate

Obviously #1 is not appealing or even acceptable. But innovation is easier said than done! Innovate where, and how? If you are like me you get sick of the experts who tell you the answer to the pressing questions facing our companies is “to innovate” and then they walk away, offering no specifics. They should have saved their breath because their solution was a non-solution in that it is too vague to help solve anything.

It is like if there were a tsunami coming in the distance and you were to ask a “tsunami expert” how to survive and they were to tell you to simply “build a boat” and then walked away. Well, without telling you how to build a boat and what tools to use their advice was pretty much worthless. While that may qualify as an answer, without specifics, it is no solution. What we need in todays challenging economy is solutions.  So I am going to offer some.

Where Should You Focus Your Innovation Efforts?

The key to continuous and profitable growth in the new economy according to Gallup, McKinsey, the Harvard School of Business and countless other experts (plus my direct experience) is to do a better job of engaging the minds and activating the motivations of the people who work with and for you; at all levels.

So, focus upon innovating in the area of increasing levels of employee engagement.

Increasing employee engagement has been proven without a doubt to have a direct impact on profitability. It also has the advantage of being largely within your control due to the fact that everyone you are trying to affect works with you. You are working with a “captive audience” who wins when you win. This is unlike the traditional 3 part profit generating model described above. In that model, for you to make more money, someone somewhere has to lose money. And anytime you can go from a win/lose model to a win/win model things happen much easier.

While many think of employee engagement as a touchy-feely tool born in the 80’s and 90’s modern executives realize that increasing employee engagement is the most effective way to increase profits in the post industrial, new “knowledge” economy.

Think about it these very simple terms: To increase employee engagement I must create an environment that results in people being intrinsically motivated to be more engaged in the act of working. They then work more. As they work more production increases – It can’t not! Then as production increases this often means efficiencies are achieved. The combination of higher production and greater efficiencies always results in more profits and more savings. – It can’t not!

The formula is really that simple. And it is proven successful every time it is properly implemented. So the better you become at using your human capital the more financial capital you will create. In fact, as you become more proficient at maximizing your human capital assets your financial assets (profits) will increase almost automatically.

Ok so that is the “What”, Now for the “How”

If we think of employee engagement in non-professional terms, all it is is creating an environment where people are not only comfortable working with you but theylike working with you…as a person! This too is a pretty simple concept that, in my opinion, has been overly complicated.

I think many in management expect the employees to engage us after we do some team building exercises or have a few company functions. But it takes more than that.

Employee engagement happens when the “bosses” (a word I dislike) make a consistent effort to make a solid effort to engage the workforce initially at their level. One has to take the time to understand their world, seek their input and to show that you are interested. But beware, they may be suspicious at first. But if you mean what you are doing and keep showing up, they will begin responding in powerful ways.

However, you have to be willing to engage them not as a “boss” who tells them what to do, but as a person who is an empowered facilitator who can help them to get their work done.

If you cannot make this fundamental shift and engage your workforce as people who are smart, have insights and would love to contribute more, then you cannot expect them to engage you.

But if you do make that sustainable effort, not only will they repay the favor by engaging you more but the information and the satisfaction you get will motivate you to continue engaging them as the people they are.

Another quick tip is to STOP seeing your organization as an Org Chart and begin viewing it, and engaging it, as a “knowledge network”.

So, imagine if you had access to a living, talking library that collectively contained all the information you need to run, grow and innovate your business. Wouldn’t you be excited to access that powerful resource on a daily basis and pick its brain? Wouldn’t you be excited to go to where it was in your building and engage it? Of course you would.

Then once you engage that library you will see how willing it becomes to come to where you are and share its knowledge with you. And in that moment your entire business will begin rising to a whole new level. And so will your profits!

Jeffrey Deckman is the founder of Capability Accelerators. He is an expert in helping organizations to increase profits by building top leadership teams who excel at engaging the workforce. He can be reached at JDeckman@CapabilityAccelerators.com

From Change to Changed ~ 3 Stages of Transformation

Jeffrey S. Deckman, 

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11.28.12 

We all change all day, every day and so does everyone and everything else. Yet the mere thought of “Change” causes more disruption, fear and paralysis in people, and organizations, than almost anything I can think of, except perhaps death and public speaking. So, this article is going to focus on the subject of Change and what we can do to help our organizations, and the people in them, to go from fearing Change to enveloping it and becoming Changed or “Transformed”.

I am not going to talk about Change from the standpoint of how disruptive it can be. Instead I want to explore the subject and explain some of the dynamics that get activated when people are faced with changes to their environment. In addition, I will give some insights into how to assist people to productively move through Change.

First things First

I will start out by arguing against the myth that people fear change. Believing that people naturally fear change is not only a limiting presumption but it is simply not true.  And I can prove it.

If you decided to buy a new car today would the thought of changing your old car for a new car scare you? I think not. What if you just found out that you won the lottery?  Would the prospect of your life changing in such a way strike terror in you? Or, what about the change that comes from getting a sought after promotion or from being accepted at the college of your choice?

In each of these situations would your initial and primary response be one of  fear or excitement?

The point is that we don’t fear change. What we fear is that which we perceive will result in a decrease in stability or security. We also fear that which we don’t understand. At the core of all of this is the fact that we fear anything which threatens our sense of control.

On the other hand if a change occurs that we either quickly understand; feel as though we can control or is something we feel will result in our becoming better off, we greet that change with excitement and anticipation.

It then stands to reason that if you want to minimize the impact a change will have on your organization you must focus upon helping people to understand the reasons for the change as well as the probable impact, positive or negative, the change may have on them.

           

The Importance of Communication

With that being understood it is easy to see that effective Communication is a major component that determines how quickly people and organizations adapt to change. But it is important to remember that communication does not mean simply talking. Studies have shown that only 7% of our communication comes from the words we speak. Another 35% is in the tone we use and the remaining 57% is via body language. There is a lot which impacts how we communicate.

Effective communication is also not just communicating your side of the story, it is bi-directional. The way to achieve true communication is best described by Steven Covey, who is perhaps the world’s foremost expert on the subject. He tells us to “First seek to understand and then seek to be understood.”

What is required to understand someone is to first create a safe zone for them to express themselves and encourage them to do so. Understand that their concerns are valid to them, allow them to express these concerns and then LISTEN!

By the way, simply being quiet while the other person is talking is not listening. To really listen requires that you engage them in a dialogue to insure that you understand them. (This is called Active Listening) Even if you do not share their concerns seek to understand them as it is in that understanding which you will find the keys as to how to best address their concerns.

The Importance of Trust

If you are going to attempt to effectively communicate you must first understand that there is no Communication without Trust. If you are talking to someone and either of you don’t trust the other there is no effective communication taking place. There is only positioning and limited honesty. “Seeking to understand” quickly establishes that you care about the other person and that builds trust. As trust grows so too grows the level and quality of your communication. They are directly linked together.

Another way to build trust is by being tactful and respectful in your communications. If you are careful with your words and are considerate you will find that people will react much in the same way back to you.

However, never underestimate another person’s ability to detect when, and if, you are being disingenuous. We all have a sixth sense about that and while you may be saying all the right words if you aren’t being truthful either your tone or your body language will betray you.

As you can see gaining someone’s trust is complex. In fact I would argue that it is so complex that you shouldn’t even attempt it if you aren’t completely serious about earning it.

The 3 Stages that lead from “Change to Changed”

So far we have been setting the stage for change to occur. This next part will briefly describe the 3 stages that people, and organizations, go through as they evolve from being unsettled about a change to settling into it.

The 3 stages of this evolution are Change, Transition and Transformation.

Change:

This first step can be defined both as a situational phenomenon that may sometimes be temporary as well as what the person feels hey are being called upon to do; for instance, when a situation changes people are then called upon to change.

Situational change refers to any number of “newness” elements ranging from a departmental shift to the appointment of a new boss. Changing events are seen as external to us and are reflective of a shift in our environment.  Yet changes in people are always internal first and they challenge us to shift our consciousness if we are to adapt.

Change is the end result of an event or an intervention. People’s typical initial response to change is reactive, sporadic and unpredictable. It is a time of uncertainty of conditions and a period of unpredictability in people.

Transition:

This next step refers to people’s evolving response to Change. It refers to the psychological adaptation and early acceptance to a changed environment. This process pertains to the shifting “hearts and minds of employees. It is in this mental state of Transition where employees are deciding to “let go” of old ways and begin embracing a new way.

Since this process occurs on an individual level (implicitly also at each individual’s pace), it is arguably the single most unpredictable element in the management of change to transformation. It is at this critical point where people either “snap back to grid” and retain their original mindset or they begin to adapt to the existing conditions and evolve into the new environment. So care must be taken as you seek to assist them through this stage as it is in this area where it is determined who moves forward and who falls back.

Transformation:

This point marks the final stage in the Change process. Transformation is when acceptance, adaptation, assimilation and a settled adjustment occurs within the people as well as in the organization. This is when the mindset of the people is in alignment with the new conditions existing around the organization. The people and the organization have evolved to adapt to the same set of conditions and are once again working in synergy to move forward.

What was once considered Change is now considered the “norm”.

Then things settle down once again…..until the next round. And the system repeats itself.

Conclusion:

The thing to remember about the 3 Stages of Change is that in the first phase you and your employees feel disoriented and perhaps fearful. You must then establish Trust in order to establish effective Communications.

The level of Trust and Communication that you establish then becomes the single largest factor in determining how many, and who, make it through the precarious Transition stage.

Those who make it through that stage will be the ones who have not only Transformed themselves but who have also identified themselves as the ones who can be depended upon to help transform your organization into one that is adaptive, sustainable and very resilient.

And that is a powerful formula for success.

Jeffrey Deckman is the founder of Capability Accelerators and the creator of the Bigger Know Principles of Leadership. (www.TheBiggerKnow.com). He is an expert at building agile and resilient leadership teams and cultures that increase morale, productivity and profitability. He can be reached at JDeckman@CapabilityAccelerators.com

Management Has a Right to a Peaceful Workplace Too! 

Jeffrey S Deckman, Founder Capability Accelerators 

The focus of my practice is to help build skillful and resilient leadership teams at the supervisor, manager and executive levels. This is very rewarding in that a high percentage of people at these levels are very conscientious, have a solid work ethic and are life long learners. They are also good at their jobs and care greatly about the company and their coworkers; which is often why they were promoted in the first place. But these people face a unique set of stresses that non-management people never experience. 

What I am talking about is something that is considered taboo and even politically incorrect, certainly by union leadership and others who spread the self-serving myth that workers have to be protected from management. The premise being that people who work their way up from “worker to management” somehow magically become power hungry and a threat to those they supervise. 

Well, sometimes the opposite it true. Sometimes it is the supervisor or manager who has to be protected from a rogue worker who is intent on being as disruptive as possible, for whatever reason. 

While this may be a foreign concept to those who have never been in management I guarantee anyone who has management experience is nodding their head in agreement at this very moment. They can relate. 


The Gallup organization released a study a while back that identified three classifications of employees: Highly Engaged, Moderately Engaged and Actively Disengaged. In the typical company 29% of the people are highly engaged; 55% are Moderately Engaged and 16% are “Actively Disengaged.” 

 It is those who make up the 16% that this article is focused upon. Gallup describes these people as ones who are actively working against the organization. These are people who, for whatever reason, have chosen to be disruptive to management and their own colleagues. They often do this by avoiding work, challenging anything they don’t approve of, chronically complaining and stirring up co-workers who were otherwise content. The amount of stress and distress these people cause is significant, especially to their managers. 

And while I have seen my share of bad management styles, most are a result of a lack of training in the human and group dynamics that one must understand in order to effectively engage and lead people around them. However, most of the bad employee antics I have seen are not a result of someone not understanding how to be a good employee. 

The negative impact these people have is often magnified by the manager initially trying to avoid directly confronting the worker so as not to be considered a “hard-ass” or over-reactive. But once the manager does decides to act, the process they must follow is laborious; often taking weeks and months to document EVERYTHING through a series of verbal and written warnings. This adds significantly to the manager’s workload and stress. It also steals precious time which must be made up by their working late to get their regular jobs done. 

Meanwhile the rogue employee is free to engage in multiple rounds of guerrilla warfare using tactics that range from being moody, acting passive/aggressively and even “behaving” for a while. The “temporarily behaving” tactic can be very effective for them. It often results in their manager stopping the disciplinary process or even resetting the discipline clock in an act of good faith that often comes back to haunt them. 

All of these tactics are purposeful and masterful acts of manipulation of a good hearted person working within a well intentioned system designed to protect workers from the exact type of abuse and anxieties the miscreant is purposefully inflicting upon others.

Understanding the Mindset:
So how does one handle one who is not only determined to be disruptive, but who is also clever enough to know the restrictions placed on management? 

Well, you have to out think them. But to out think them you must first understand how they think. 

At the expense of oversimplifying things constantly disgruntled people fit into two basic categories:

   1. Those who feel victimized, are emotionally immature, and who lack the communication skills and/or the self confidence to address situations maturely. They may also openly pout and shut down. They see themselves as Eeyore. These people can be called passive aggressors. 

   2. Those who feel victimized, are emotionally immature, are angry and aggressive, who bend truth and situations to justify their actions and who openly challenge anyone who won’t give them what they think they should have. They see themselves as a heroic Joan of Arc fighting against evil oppressors. These people can be called active aggressors. 

They are both primarily self-centered and think the world should bend to them. When it doesn’t they make those above, around and below them pay. Because of their self centered view of life they also tend to become self-righteous which serves to allow them to justify any actions they take while keeping them conveniently able to play the role of victim. 

However one of the most underhanded, but effective, traits they share is that they are manipulators of people, situations and of the truth. This often catches their managers by surprise because most people, yes even management, are honest, open and seek to move peacefully through life without creating unnecessary dramas or hurting people. 

Countering Tactics – Truth, Transparency, Accountability:
The first thing I do when I have identified one of these folks is that I prepare myself to encounter their manipulative and emotional based tactics. Those are two favorite tools the “Eddie Haskill’s” use to disrupt things, keep you off balance and to secure their advantage. If you understand their game and steel yourself to resist their pull you have taken the first step in turning the advantage to your side. 

I then “rise up” to a high level of professionalism and work hard to stay there. Emotion and deception is their weapon. Therefore, intellect and honesty is my counter. At the same time discipline is their weakness. This means that if I make discipline my strength I begin to gain build even more momentum. 

I then slow….every….thing….down and I seek to clearly understand what is going on. Fast-talking and working to confuse is another tool of theirs. So I remove it from them by asking questions designed to help me methodically attempt to put their puzzle pieces together. I calmly ask for clarity on anything I don’t understand. One of my most effective phrases is: “Help me understand that better.” This allows me to hear them out if they are being honest or flush them out if they are being manipulative.

Manipulators hate being made to make their stories, their viewpoints or their thinking make sense because they have carefully created story lines that make them appear perfectly innocent or well intentioned. Or sometimes they just throw out as much BS as they can to confuse you or to justify their actions. This results in them often not even remembering parts of what they said. 

So when you slow them down, they get tangled in the loose ends of their stories and the advantage further shifts in your direction. This is because the only thing manipulators dislike more than not getting their own way is being caught in their act. 

Since lies are the manipulator’s friends that means that truth is their enemy. So seek truth. Use it. Stand for it. Because the light of truth has the same affect on the manipulator as the light of day has on the vampire. It repels and weakens them both. 

In time, not only will they learn that lying to you is going to be a painful experience for them but they will also learn they can’t manipulate you and in that you begin to define that your culture is one of honesty. In doing so you are making a clear statement to them and others that neither lying or liars are accepted or acceptable. Hopefully, they respond positively to your stand for integrity and understand that what you are actually doing is working to help them to save their jobs by teaching them which behaviors will get them terminated. 

As you can imagine there is always more to learning how to become impervious to these workplace “vampires” who suck the energy, time and profits out of those very companies that fund their livelihood. But hopefully this information will give you a fighting chance against them. 

It sure works for me. 

Jeffrey Deckman is the founder of Capability Accelerators and the creator of the Bigger Know Principles of Leadership. (www.TheBiggerKnow.com). He is an expert at building agile and resilient leadership teams and cultures that increase morale, productivity and profitability. He can be reached at JDeckman@CapabilityAccelerators.com